The yankees have announced that Joba Chamberlain will make his first start Tuesday at home against the Toronto Blue Jays.

Yes, the Yanks are actually going to go through with it…they’re going to lift fat Joba out of the bullpen and make him a fat starter.

This is a very risky move for the Yanks. If it doesn’t work, they’ll have exposed Joba to arm injury, as well as messed up their bullpen.

Then again, if it does work, they’ll have themselves a good starter. Three more of those and they’ll have an actual halfway decent pitching rotation.

My prediction? Joba will get lit up his first start, and Hank Steinbrenner will fire the pitching coach.

Likely #2 overall draft pick Michael Beasley wants us to not be too disappointed in him when he ends up like Joakim Noah.

“I just turned 19 years old in January,” Beasley said at Pre-Draft Day Media Camp. “How mature do you want me to be? I’m still a kid. I’m not 20 yet. I’m not legal. I can vote, but that’s about it. On the basketball side of things, I’m 30 years old. Off the court, I don’t know how old y’all want me to be. Do you want me to act 25? 30? 40?. I’m 19. I’m a kid. I’m going to live my life. I’m going to mess up. I don’t know as much as you do or him. I’m learning day by day. I hear a lot about character issues. But I’ve yet to hear what those character issues are. Until I hear somebody tell me, I don’t feel the need to change.”

I can’t wait for the first arrest for something stupid like having an open container on a sidewalk. “What did you expect? I’m a kid. I told you.”

I wouldn’t touch Beasley with a ten-foot pole after this. I don’t care how much talent he has. He’s basically promising that he’s going to do something bad.

Whoever drafts this guy…don’t say you weren’t warned.

Serena Williams got knocked out of the French Open by 27th seeded Katarina Srebotnik. Afterward, Serena behaved like a jerk to the media…doing nothing for Franco-American relations.

Oh Serena…you’re such an important person. You don’t have time to answer a few questions after a tennis match.

Listen hon, it’s pretty simple…you can just not show up for the press conferences. And not show up for the matches. No one really cares at this point. You aren’t any good. Maria Sharapova and Ana Ivanovic have shot way past you in every way possible. Just do us all a favor and get lost.

Rasheed Wallace unleashed a profanity-laced tirade after the Pistons’ Game 5 loss to Boston, in which he criticized the officiating and accused Boston players of flopping.

“All that bull(bleep)-ass calls they had out there…you’ve all seen that (bleep),” Wallace said. “The cats are flopping all over the floor and they’re calling that (bleep). That (bleep) ain’t basketball out there. It’s all (bleeping) entertainment.”

The league has since issued a statement saying it plans to fine players who flop too much…meaning Tony Parker is going to be a whole lot lighter in the wallet next season.

This decision to deal with serial floppers is vindication for Rasheed. At the same time, the league has fined Sheed $25,000 for criticizing the refs and swearing a lot.

Meanwhile, Sheed’s techincal foul count has him tottering on the brink of a suspension. Here we are in the midst of a grinding playoff run by Detroit, with Rip Hamilton and Chauncey Billups both banged-up, and Sheed is one T away from having to sit Game 7.

Sheed may be fun to watch and listen to, but he ain’t the brightest bulb in the strand.

Vince Young made headlines a few days ago when he told an interviewer he considered retiring over the rigors of being a rookie quarterback in the nfl.

Now Vince is backpedaling on those remarks, claiming the whole thing was made out to be much more than it really was.

“Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I ain’t never said I was going to quit football,” Young said. “There was a lot of stuff going on in my life, but football is not hard to me. Football is easy. All you have to do is be coachable and use your God-given talent. If it was a thought at all it was just a passing thought for a second.'’

It didn’t take much for Vince to rethink his self-pitying statements…just people all over the media questioning his toughness and desire.

The only thing I’m going to question is Vince’s judgment for saying what he said in the first place. Clearly, this guy lacks a filter between his brain and his mouth…otherwise he would’ve realized what he was opening himself up to.

If I’m a Titans fan, I have grave doubts about Vince’s ability to lead my team to anything. And the first time he misses time with an apparent minor injury…well, those worries are only going to get worse.

Days after the collective sports media mocked the packers for keeping the retired Brett Favre’s locker intact, the team decided to have the nameplate bearing Favre’s name removed from said locker.

Coach Mike McCarthy addressed this momentous decision, and future plans for the locker which could include giving it to Favre as a gift:

I think it’s been totally blown out of proportion. It’s frankly an excellent idea that Ted Thompson and the organization had as far as a gift on a personal note to Brett. It’s been discussed with Brett, and we can talk about it at a later date. But its really a construction concern, is the reason why the locker hasn’t been taken out of there. So there’s nothing more to it. A lot has been made of it. … Ted, at the board of directors meeting yesterday, talked about the Brett locker situation and told them the plans that he had had as far as what he was going to do with the locker and they gave him a standing ovation. It’s a classy move and something that definitely reflects how the Green Bay Packers do business and how they appreciate what Brett Favre has done in his career.

I think the Packers should just go all the way with it and rip Lambeau Field out by its foundations and give that to Favre. I’m sure Brett has more than enough land down there in Mississippi to hold a complete football stadium. Of course then the Packers would have nowhere to play, except a big hole in the ground surrounded by parking lot. It wouldn’t matter anyway since everyone knows they’re going to suck without Favre. Might as well just disband the team altogether.

The Spurs led by 17 in Game 5 and couldn’t hold it. They also had a 20 point lead in an earlier game of the series and couldn’t hold that. That’s not the kind of stuff defending NBA champs are supposed to do. I’d say the Spurs’ run is over…they will not win anymore titles in the Tim Duncan era.

The Lakers, on the other hand, could be in for a nice 2 or 3 year run of championships. Kobe Bryant will likely wind up with as many rings as Michael Jordan, and more than Shaquille Oneal.

21-year-old Vancouver Canucks defenseman Luc Bourdon was killed in a motorcycle crash near Shippagan, New Brunswick, Canada on Thursday.

Police would not confirm Bourdon as the victim of the crash. They would only say that a single motorcyclist had been killed when he apparently lost control of his vehicle and crashed into a tractor-trailer.

Bourdon, a rookie performer in 2007-2008, was drafted 10th overall in 2005. He played 27 games his first year with Vancouver, scoring two goals with no assists.

With all apologies to Carl Lewis - newly wed Mariah Carey now is the proud owner of the title as the worst ‘opening pitch thrower EVER’. Maybe her 12″ heels didn’t work too well on the mound?!

Mike Meyers is coming to theaters everwhere as Pitka the Love Guru… and the NHL is amazingly giddy. After drawing pathetic ratings during a very exciting NHL playoffs, the NHL is going to get more buzz and pr from the-sure-to-be-smash-hit Love Guru:

You can see the Love Guru preview (and 200,000 other clips) in this Video Detective widget (which you can grab with the “get this widget” button):

More exciting than the actual NHL Stanley Cup… sadly:

Mike Meyers gives Don Cherry a run for his money:

Justin Timberlake also makes an appearance (with a terrific mustache that makes stan van gundy squirm in jealousy):